“SINGU LADY PALAVA” (EP#2)- Babe, You too Dey Form Sha! Too Picky; 4 SIGNsnDANGERS of Being Picky

IMG_6073What did you say? Abeg! Abeg! Abeg! (Raising her hand in air) please, please, please, ……What is it “gan sef”? I said I a-m not inte-res-ted (stretching her head forward), na by force? If he is that good, een, you too go and date him now. Leave your bobo and go-and-date-him. Haba! What is it? Mtchew! 🙄 (hissing)…. See me see wahala o. Tife (aka Singu lady) responded as she walks away from her friend, Bolu.

Bolu (Tife’s GF): Tife! Tife! Tife! Ha! …. Pointing her fore-finger at Tife as Tife walks away, (falling into deep thought) I hope this is not bondage o. Three “betta” guys in one year.  Are guys that easy to come by like that? What do I do with this girl? O ga o. It’s one excuse or the other. With Dapo, it was his height. With Kunle, na job problem and now David. She didn’t even allow me to me to land. Immediately she got to know the kind of car David drives and where he lives, she switched off. “Dis one no be vanity so?”………  Is it me or something, you know what, I’m going to get her mom’s thought on this. Yes, let me go to her house and speak with her mom. Bolu got into her car and drove off.

Tife’s House………

Bolu- Good afternoon ma.

Mrs Akinola (Tife’s mom)- Good afternoon my dear.  How are you? Mommy and Daddy “nko”?

Bolu- They are fine ma. They extend their greetings. Eeem, mommy, is Tife home?

Mrs Akinola- Yes, as a matter of fact, she just came in less than 10 mins ago, greeted me abruptly and went inside. Is there anything the matter?

Bolu- Looking towards Tife’s room, she whispered…..mommy, there is something I want to discuss with you. It is Tife again o.


With all my degrees……Me, date someone with ordinary bachelors…..God forbid!!!!!

Mommy- “Ki lo tun de?” What’s happenning again? I hope all is well……..

Bolu- Again looking towards Tife’s room to be sure she’s not hearing what she was saying….. No, no, no, everything is fine. There is just this issue that has happened a few times and I wanted to bring to your attention.  There is this fine guy I want to introduce to Tife. Mommy this guy is fine and he has a good job. Tife was initially excited when I told her about him but immediately she got to know where he works and lives, she just shut me off completely. She said she’s not interested.

Mrs Akinola– Really? Uumm….interesting….and she didn’t even get to meet the man?

Bolu- No. Mommy, this is the third time this is happening this year.

Mrs Akinola- uuumm… “o ga o”. What tyoe of person is this man….you know what Bolu, let me speak with her when she’s more relaxed, maybe, she’ll listen to me. I’ll get to know why she’s acting this way.

Bolu- Thank you mommy. Let me quickly leave. I’ll call later.

Mrs Akinola- Thank you my dear. Good bye. Extend my greetings to your parents. Uummm (sighing)….deep in thoughts….This is becoming repetitive. Tife, Tife, Tife….. I hope you know that “ale obinrin kii pe’su” meaning “a woman ages sooner than expected”…………..

Tife, Tife, Tife…..Your mom is indeed right and I hope you listen to her. You have to be very careful when it comes to the criteria you use in screening out the guys you can or cannot go out with. I have seen quite a number of women that have extremely high standard that were unrealistic in their expectations and as a result, have allowed good guys to pass them by, ignoring and not giving them a chance. At the end of the day these women either settle for less or enter late thirties/forties and are still single. Be careful…

4 signs that you are too picky in your choice of boyfriend

Too Picky Sign #1- If your ideal man must have certain features or attributes – He must be tall, light skinned, hairy guy etc. During my dating time, I remember we used to have babes that would say things like this. He must have this, he must be like that….. pointed nose ladidadida…. Please this is shallow and unrealistic. I don’t know if single ladies these days still speak like these but if they do, it is so wrong. So so wrong.

Too Picky Sign #2- If you’ve heard from multiple people that you are too picky- Then it is time to take a step back and re-assess yourself. Especially if the people don’t know each other. Your friends, family, colleagues at work etc. When you hear people tell you “you need to take it easy”. In Yoruba they say “re e le” meaning “bring it down” or “come down from your high pedestal”.

Too Picky Sign #3- If all your friends are getting hooked and going into marriage and for some reasons, nothing is happening on your side. It’s not that you don’t meet guys, you do but what happen is that after a couple of outings without any tangible reason, you are no longer interested. In fact, sometimes some women say the man nauseate them and they say stuff life “my skin just crawls”.  If this happens over and over again, they you need to check yourself.

Too picky Sign #4- If you believe in ready-made guys- There is a saying common among babes during my time. They would say I am an “Olorun sogo babe” not a “Suurulere” meaning I am a “ready-made” guy type of babe not a “patience is rewarding”. I don’t think this is a right type of thinking.

My thought…..

I belong to the school of thought that a woman should have a list of qualities she’s looking for in a man (like values, religion, principles, opinion on life issues etc.) but please when a lady begins to use physical features as a yardstick then there will be issues. One thing I can tell single ladies is that physical features does not make a great husband. It is what is deposited in the man. His character. Please do not misconstrue me. I believe a woman needs to be attracted to the person she’s going out with and will get married to. Attraction is important but please don’t let it be too much of a deciding factor. Remember, fine face no dey make good husband o. Only responsible godly men make the best husbands. 

Please leave a comment below. Or send me an email (tolusworld@gmail.com) in case you have anything you want to share with me.

Until next week Monday when I’ll bring you “anoda” episode of our dear “Singu Lady’s Palava”….Ciao and enjoy your week……Mwah 🙂

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