TOLUSWORLD TABLE-TALK (TTT#1)- CHALLENGES n BEAUTY OF SETTLING DOWN IN GEORGIA

IMG_5702It’s been almost 9 months since my family moved to Georgia. Can you believe that? Wow! So much has happened. It feels like we just moved last month. How time flies. Remember I blogged about it here  “From Jersey to Georgia. the Good the Bad and the Ugly of my Family Relocation“. If you are thinking of moving and you think that is tough, wait till you try settling down in your new city then you’ll experience what real tough is. 

As human beings we take for granted things we have, relationships or environment we find ourselves that came about organically without us having to force it. Settling down in Georgia has brought quite a number of these factors to my awareness. So what are the few challenges I am encountering moving to Georgia.

Having to make new friends OMGoodness!!!!! This is by far the most difficult of all my challenges. For people who know me, I can hear you say “You, Tolu…..not you. If making friends could be difficult for you, then it will be difficult for everyone”….W-R-O-N-G!!! I can tell you right now, it is so difficult. I don’t know whether it is the age or something else. Because when I was younger, it never used to take me this long. One thing I noticed though is that when one is younger, guards are let down. Unlike adult life where we have all been moulded as a result of our life experiences, both good and bad.

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. Adults (me inclusive) are more guarded and do not allow just anyone into their lives. I’ll like to add that some people do not make it easy to be friends with them. Ha! “Den too dey pose (we pose too much)….Ki lode? What is it?. I was reading on the internet the other day how to make new friends in a new city and I read that you must always put a smiley face on, be the first to greet, don’t be too shy or guarded to greet etc. So I decided to practise this out. With my smiley face on my sleeves, enthusiastically, I greeted 2 ladies on different occasions in church. These were ladies that I had been introduced to before and we had chatted briefly once or twice before…..OMGoodness, you should see the way they looked through me when I greeted them….like I was transparent. I mean, they both responded to my greetings but in a “not very nice way”. My jaw dropped! ……. My hubby was there on one of the occasions and even noticed (he was behind me). He asked me why the lady behaved that way, I told him I didn’t know. I said maybe they were having a bad day. We were both shocked. Anyways, I picked jaw up and walked away. It happened again 2 more times after that in the same manner with the same ladies,  so I just decided to let it be with these ones. 🙁

Finding a Home Church- I never knew church played such a huge role in people’s lives. Honestly speaking. I joined my old church almost 10years ago……just at its inception and stayed there, practically had all my children there. 90% of my very good friends attended the same church. So I never had to go church shopping before. Finding a home church with a decent proximity to my home, a church where my children would feel comfortable and at the same time suit my needs is very challenging for me. To be able to balance all these is almost impossible. Recently, I met 2 different couples, one moved to Georgia last week and the other moved to Georgia last year. While conversing with them, one of the first question they both asked was “have you found a home church yet?”. This is to show that (for Christians) finding and planting your family in a decent church is important and could be challenging in Georgia.

Adjusting to new routines and new neighborhood- This ranks #3 on my challenge list. As a career woman working with Johnson and Johnson for 9 years, taking the same route at about the same time to work every day for 9 years. Jogging the same road for 5 years, going to the same gym for 6 years, grocery shopping in the same store, using the same laundromat etc. and having to change that now….It’s a lot of changes at once. Like Russians will say “patichonishku”….”little-by-little” I am getting used to it. 🙂

So what are the beauties of my settling down:

Children adjusted and settled very well- The speed at which children acclimatize at times amaze me. I was concerned moving here because my children won’t be seeing their good old friends for a while anymore. But to my surprise, they have not only adjusted but have also made new friends. They have settled very well in school and are doing great.

I have few good old friends here and I’ve also made a couple of new ones. My friends here have made my settling down beautiful. They gave me a soft landing. I have some friends here that we met in Jersey. They moved here few years ago. They have kept me company. I have also met a few new ones. One of which I met through my old network. When reading on how to make friends in a new city, one of the methods given was the use your old network to get new ones. So I tried and it worked. See, I am being intentional about everything right? An old friend introduced her to me and we have  “jelled” since then. One of my old friends took me out to Dinner 2 days ago celebrating my birthday. I will blog it in the next few days. Look out.

Do you have any ideas on what can assist in settling down well in a new city? Please share with me in the comment section below.

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